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The Lucky Country

Posted by Philip Smith on 8 April 2018
The Lucky Country


The best path to happiness is to laugh at ourselves, so just for a moment, let us not be too serious.

For a long time I have listened to people making the statement that we are "the Lucky Country" and for many years I have tried to get an answer as to why we are supposed to be the Lucky Country.

Last week a friend explained it to me. He said "we are lucky that the politicians have not completely destroyed the country, yet".

For many years all surveys into trusted professions, place politicians very low down on their lists and not one of us is surprised. Instead we nod our heads and say a silent "yup".  Then we go out and vote for the least bad one, as our "democracy" demands that we have to vote, under threat of a fine.

To quote a "Voice of the People" column published in the Lowell Sun in September 1976 and written by Robert S. Borden:

"Has it ever dawned on the editors that the attitudes of the 70 million projected non-voters may be very consistent with the reality that the concept of voting and electing representatives is basically dishonest and fraudulent. If voting could change anything it would be made illegal! There is no way any politicians can legally represent anyone because he was elected on a secret ballot by a small percentage of voters. He then claims to represent the people who voted against him and even those who wisely chose not to participate in such criminal activity." 

Clearly there will be many opinions on this subject and I will leave it to the clever people to figure out, while I make a suggestion regarding another field where we can use the same mechanism we use in Australia to elect our governments.

It has been reported that Australia will be bidding for the 2032 Olympics and maybe this is the ideal opportunity to also show that we are the "Smart" country and not just the "Lucky Country."

We can use our electoral system as a template to revolutionise the entire Olympic movement. 

I am not a biblical scholar so please forgive me for probably misquoting the meaning of the scripture, but I looked it up for you.

Luke 13:30
"And indeed, some who are last will be first, and some who are first will be last."

Now I have to conclude that our politicians must be very committed to following this injunction, otherwise our electoral system makes no sense.

Let me explain, as best I can, as one needs at least a PHD to understand how this works or how this can be democratic, but here goes, and just remember I warned you.

Prior to an election political parties can do "preference" deals with other political parties and additionally any one electoral area can do its own side deals.

The parties then hand out "how to vote" cards on election day.

Lets say there are 6 candidates in one electorate, the how to vote card will have the same layout as the ballot paper  and the number next to each party shows you the party preference, should you elect to vote for them. In other words the "How to Vote" cards from each party will have a different distribution of numbers. 

This example is to support The Drovers Dog Party 

5.  Dog & Pony Party
6.  Mechanics Party
1.  The Drovers Dog Party
3.  Pink Poppy party
4.  Boat Peoples Party
2.  No Fast food Party

As a loyal supporter of The Drovers Dog Party you can simply fill in the numbers as shown on the how to vote card. 

Should you be crazy enough to not just follow the numbers as indicated, you can select your own and that is the simple version.  There is another option that will require a deep knowledge of all candidates and a requirement to complete a form that is several yards long with maybe a hundred options to complete, but we will ignore that option. 

At the end of the election all the numbers must be compiled and this is how it works :

                                                      Votes received
5.  Dog & Pony Party                       - 1000
6.  Mechanics Party                         - 1200
1.  The Drovers Dog Party               -  900
3.  Pink Poppy party                         -  700
4.  Boat Peoples Party                      - 1010
2.  No Fast food Party                       -  800

On the surface it appears that the Mechanics party is elected but the preferences now kick in and the winner is, drum roll.  The Dog and Pony Party who did a preference deal with The Pink Poppy party ( 1000 + 700 ). I am sure I have this wrong but I think you get the idea.

And there you have it "And indeed, some who are last will be first, and some who are first will be last."

Now let us extend this "democratic" wisdom to the Olympics :

We can completely abolish the entire Olympic movement and save all the money wasted on these bureaucrats, who are at best administrators and rule makers.

Every country wishing to send a team to participate in our olympics event will have to "elect" a team to represent their country. They will be know as Olympic Organisation, Peoples Selection or OOPS.

Athletes ( candidates ) can elect to participate without having any knowledge or skills at any particular sport.  Sponsors and interest groups can promote any person they like who might best promote their Brand or Products or Ideas. 

There will be no limit to the amount of money used to promote the candidates. 

Only Sponsors and special interest groups, who donated money, can vote.

Using the "preference" electoral system candidates can be elected.

Once a "team" is elected they will select a leader from within the team, who can then appoint, from this same group, senior and junior leaders ( much the same as Ministers and deputy Ministers.  

Considering that many of those elected, will have no ability to participate in any scheduled event or have any knowledge of any events, they can "employ" staff who might have some knowledge ( consultants ). The consultants can then undertake longitudinal studies, draft strategies, position papers, green papers, white papers and more.

As they have years to prepare for the final event, there will be lots of time for international conferences, inspections of facilities, meetings with "other interested parties" and review studies in exotic locations.

As they approach the Olympics the local Oops can decide who will participate in the final teams. This selection cannot be based on ability, as this would discriminate against some. They will have to stay mindful to include all groups that can be identified, as there are now over 60 gender groups as well as other groups worthy of consideration, such as the Left Handed Screw Threaders. 

They will also be able to introduce completely new events to accommodate the range of "inactive" participants. We could see new events such as egg throwing and hotdog eating. Vegetarian options can be provided to include all those who have "dietaries".

Prior to any individual race the "athletes" can do a deal with others in the race, remember our preference scheme. They can also make promises to invest money, build hospitals, schools, free childcare and any other outrageous claims to gain the preferences they desire. Extra points may be awarded for the most outrageous promises made during the preference negotiations. They all know this is just a game with no serious intent, but it will make for interesting news feeds to see who is promising what to whom.

The value of each place will be determined by the final betting odds from the bookmakers.  In this way the person who comes in last ( 10th ) can still win if they also had the lowest odds to win from the bookmakers. ( 10 plus odds )

This will change every event, in that the objective now is not to be first, but to accumulate the worst betting odds and to secure the last place in any event.

The 100mt event could then take several hours and new maximum times will have to be introduced to all events.

At last and for the first time, skill and ability will be removed to ensure "equality" for all to participate and a "level playing field".

We will prove that not only in politics, but even in sport,  "some who are last will be first, and some who are first will be last." .


Our Olympic picture gallery from the winners circle, soon to be made into a calendar.



  Lets all have some fun at the next election by voting for The Drovers Dog.




Philip SmithAuthor:Philip Smith
About: Philip specialises in getting projects and businesses that are not performing as well as expected, back on track.
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